p.s. I just want to say this quickly and move on. I'm about as emotionally low as I can ever remember being. Everything that could wrong in my life right now is going wrong. Even things I couldn't imagine would go wrong are going wrong. It's kind of unbelievable. I don't want to talk about it right now. Seriously, I don't. It's not a good idea. Please don't ask me to. Maybe at some point I'll need to, and I will. I only say this because I don't feel like I've been very present and attentive here lately. Maybe it's not noticeable, which would be great. But I feel it, and I'm sorry for that. I'm waiting for something good to happen. I'm trying to make something good happen. Nothing is working, but all bad things like all good things must come to an end, I imagine. The best thing you can do for me is to carry on here in your glorious, brilliant ways, and I'll keep up as best I can until some light breaks through. And if someone out there has put a curse on me, seriously, take the fucking curse off. Enough is enough. Now, honestly, please ignore this moan of mine and continue your talks about Billy Mackenzie and everything in your heads and lives because engaging with your energies and big brains and big hearts in crazy combination is one of the few good things going on in my existence right now, and I'd love for that not to get fucked up or diverted by my decision to vaguely characterise my state of mind right now. I know you guys care. You don't have to tell me. Please don't, actually. I can't explain why. I'm going to work through this crap in the ways I know how to, and hopefully tomorrow or next week or whenever I'll be the host I used to be and want to be again. Like I said, I just feel my lack of energy and concentration here, and, on the off chance some you do too, there's the explanation. Now, on to the good part. ** Adjoun, lost child, You guys are singlehandedly making me very glad I decided to do this murder mystery thing. Wonderful, wonderful. Thank you. ** Cycylolo, Oh, yeah, I'm just kind of out of it right now. But a meeting would be awesome. I just wrote you to set something up. Here's hoping I see you soon. ** Antonio, Like Richter's Atlas. That's so fucking funny. I wonder if a bunch of dodgy, rip-off Russian porn sites would think it was worth the time and hassle to undertake an international lawsuit against me if I stole their pix and put them in a book. I bet not, but I bet the American lawyers for whatever publisher wanted to let me do such a thing would be too fastidious and paranoid to allow it. But, yeah, that would be hot. The chubby dude is chubby. I'm just sparing you guys the fat rolls and concentrating on his ineffable Brooke Shields-like quality. Charley Ray: Well, you know he's one of my great friends, and about as a big a genius as there is. He still looks pretty good. He's still as spazzy and incorrigible as a eight year old kid. Anyway, a Charles Ray Day is in the works as a matter of fact, including some newish candid snaps I took of him. He's way heterosexual, sorry, though way gay friendly. ** Math tinder, No hyperbole at all. I was/am smitten. Okay, you've pretty much driven me to check out the New Dolls. It's just hard to imagine them without the lurching, wobbling Johnny Thunders in tow. But yeah. I have no problem at all with your blog, but then I'm an Apple dude using Safari/Firefox. ** David ehrenstein, I'll definitely look for the 'Masters of Cinema' DVD with you guys talking on it. O'Toole was really good in 'Bright Young Things.' I just caught that recently. When's your Weekly piece running? ** Atheist, Bittersweet Memories #2 boy: Whoa, yes, mm-hm, absolutely. ** Jose, On Robbe-Grillet, hm, there are so many possible places to start. You couldn't go wrong by starting with the most famous early stuff, say 'The Voyeur,' or 'Jealousy' and 'In the Labyrinth,' the latter two novels being available under one cover. My faves are the slightly later novels: 'Project for a Revolution in New York,' 'Topography of a Phantom City,' 'Recollection of the Golden Triangle,' especially. Starting with any of the aforementioned novels would work fine. I hope you enjoy it/him. ** Frankie p, Hey there. Gosh, I don't know how you'd see the 'Horror Hospital' film. DW will have to pop in here and tell you. You doing well? ** Michael karo, I don't know if I can go so far as to listen to the new Dolls album. That's too daunting and spooky. But if I see them live, and they do some new tunes, and they don't disturb me, then maybe. Thanks for the review. ** 5stringaphasia, I remember Amp. You remember the early, pretty good period of 120 Minutes? Re. Blanchot: I'm working on a Blanchot Day for the blog, and, if it works out, there'll be a bunch of links to online Blanchot texts. Fingers crossed. ** Dynomoose, Thanks for the statictick pass along. Well, that's better news about Weavie than it could have been, obviously. Still, I hope he'll look after himself. ** Killer luka, Feel free at any second to ask me to write you a recommendation letter for a residency or grant, okay? Are there doll making residencies? I wonder if just a regular artists' residency would do the trick. You know Gisele Vienne is a doll maker. Should I ask her advice? Maybe there's a doll related residency in France? I haven't seen the 'Dumbland' stuff. Maybe that's for the best? You were a ballet dancer? That's cool. I have a strange, possibly inexplicable fascination with people who dance ballet. Any pix to share? Yury is testing the waters of the pool and the usefulness of his knees again today. We'll see. And yeah, good new pic of you. ** T.pkendall, Hey. Cool. I think your idea is great. I think maybe you just need to describe what you're thinking of in a little more detail, and the interested participants will flood you. So please do, 'cos I think it sounds like an inspired project. And everybody else, come on, jump in. ** Lux, Hey man. My address is: c/o International Centre des Recollets, 150/154 rue du Faubourg St. Martin, 75010 Paris, France. One favorite music video? No, I can't think of just one. Off the top of my head, the beloved videos that spring to mind are the Bjork one you mentioned, of course. I like that Spike Jonze one of the guy on fire running for the bus in slow motion. I forget the band/song. That Sonic Youth stage diving one you mentioned is sweet, as is Harmony Korine's 'Sunday' clip, which someone else here mentioned. That Replacements one that mostly just shows a stereo speaker was cool. I actually quite like some of the Shoegazer vids, dated as they look. There was an early Spiritualized video that was really eye-attacking psychedelic, but I don't remember which song it was for. Hm. I guess that's all I can think of right now. Yeah, I saw the line-up for Thurston's ATP, and it does look great. Maybe I can swing over there. Early happy birthday to Aisha. It's been a year already, wow. ** Rigby101, I loved your posts yesterday. You're another drinking-seems-to-agree-with-your-brain kind of guy. And, yeah, the moon is definitely in some seriously awful alignment. ** C., Thank you for the props. Trying to write coherent dialogue in the weentsy space allotted by the size of those images is tough and leads to some peculiar things. It's an interesting challenge. I'm glad it comes off okay. ** Xkoesj, Oh, I'm such a slowpoke. It's just terrible. You're being so lovely and patient. I miss you, though. Word. Oh, and dare. ** Paradigm, I'm hardly one to talk, but the porn/prostitution addiction is a running backwards and downwards kind of thing unless it fuels the work, which is my excuse. ** D., I've seen some of the 'Rabbits,' and, like you, their supposed inclusion in 'Inland Empire' bodes well in my head. Exactly, I think Lynch has done what he wants to do, period, which is thrilling to contemplate. We should all be so lucky. ** Vomitingghosts, Nope, I know what was the quote and what was you. I meant you. And anyway, superb quote choice is part of it. As far as your question about the possible emptiness of ideas/knowledge gained through drugs, absolutely not for me. Drugs are just collaborators with you. I think my body gets plenty of credit for what I learned from drugs, albeit not total credit. I also think, as I've said before, that my body can do it without drugs now, maybe partly because the drugs taught my body how to reveal things that were hidden before, true. Actually, I seem to be failing myself completely at the moment, but I don't think drugs would give me the answers. They've already given the answers. The answers are: create them yourself. ** Tigersare, It's totally weird to have what you lived through revived, yeah. The trick is to question the nostalgia that's part of the revival, or I think so. I think nostalgia, as pleasureable and natural as it is, is an enemy. Re. Mischa: Mm, you'll see. ** Disco 3-way, Hi. Welcome back. Oh, yeah, your email is in my box waited to be read. I'm just trying to figure if I can actually come to Stockholm, though I'm almost sure I'm coming. It's just schedule stuff. But I definitely want to meet up and hang out. For sure. I'll write to you as soon as I have my plans in gear. Very cool about your play. I don't suppose I'll get to see it, but I wish I could. Maybe you can video it. ** Jheorgge, Hey. Uh, I think it's safe to say I'll keep working in this porn pix-meet-fight-narrative form. I haven't gotten bored of it. I have a short 'story' idea or two that I'll probably do next. I'm really glad you're liking it. ** See, magically, I feel a lot better after sharing you guys. Keep it up, and I'll try to keep my momentarily raised spirits at the current pleasant level. Check out the great Billy Mackenzie if you haven't before or even if you have. You guys are the best. Bye.
posted by Dennis Cooper at 1:34 AM
62 Comments:
berlin
berlin
berlin
b e r l i n
B E E R RRR LLL II NNNNNNNNNNN!!!
B
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DENNIS
GAH!
This Day Is The Shit. thank you Dennis.
love, math+
ps: if anyone is searching the net the mp3/lyrics to that 'answer song' to William, It Was Really Nothing [by The Smiths] it's actually called Steven, It Was Really Something [written by Alan Rankine and recorded by Billy M]
Wow- what a fascinating day - loved cover for affectionate punch - sexy or what?! (though cover for original release also good - yes, I did obsess a little). DC don't you worry about us, hate to think you're feeling guilty about whether or not we thnk you've been attentive enough on top over everything else. Yes, all bad things do come to an end but I'll oblige and refrain for sending a big tight hug.
So if you know who it is on that sexy cover do let me know!
Why haven't I heard of the man? Did he get released outside UK?
_Garrison and Rigby (so, just don't walk? or should one be selective) thanks for suggestions so far. Do keep those suggestion for LA coming through as I'm developing low levels of anxiety about the whole trip right now and hoping that feeling more organised will help stop the migraine attacks. (Just little ones - its OK - and they may well be unrelated).
_Atheist - I'm getting through it and past the bone people reference now - will send you a lovely email when I finish
__hey david c, i do not live in L.A. anymore but i did for 10 years, if you send me an email i would be happy to offer my basic advice for navigating the city and stuff like that. i don't know 'what's on in L.A.' right now but i know L.A. super-well. like if you wanna know, where can you get really good hummus? or whatever:
math at beltyourpleasure dot com
it has always been my impression that Billy MacKenzie / Alan Rankine / The Associates were barely known outside the UK, yeah. his work actually seemed to fall out of print in the UK for awhile even, at least Associates stuff. there have been loads of recent remasters/reissues, and coming into that cache of stuff is just magical. i only have 3-4 of his records so far! i first heard about him through the Morrissey connection.
love, math+
yeah totally prostitution addiction and porn has so distorted my view around friends and potential suitors (most people i'm friends with have quite left wing pro-femnist p.o.v) and i myself harbour those point of views and believe in the freedom of peoples choices and yet in the porn/prostitutes i've visited/watch i don't feel that i've empowered myself or the people i've slept with (mainly because i wasn't able to perform and left them and myself with doubts and anxiety over that.) i also think that porn adds an extra time pressure to the act of sex that makes it harder to perform and creates this anxiety within people. that's the one major criticism i have of porn the way it shortens peoples imaginations and distorts and package things into tighter artificial ideals. (the 'image' of the perfect porn body that i still find attractive) i think though with these stories you are actually having fun with and playing on this. highlighting the artificiality of porn by making the dialogue as abstract and over the top as possible.
i used to think that this addiction would help with my work but i still don't see how a guy sleeping with a prostitute can make any great/unique work of art. it seems to reinforce too many power structures. i guess though the fact that i failed to perform can be expanded out into something about the pressures that this neo-liberal patriarchial system forces on us all.
i'm sure i'll write something one day but for now i'm trying to understand it and explain it to those closest to myself and work through this lack of intimacy/ passion that i have. that billy mckenzie interview is great for that very reason.
atheist, i'm on your munchable list. shucks. i think that might change after you read the email, which owing to work commitments and a relaxing trip will not be sent until saturday. i expect you will be surprised. i'm still reluctant to send everything as well.
Yu're too alive to 'fail yourself," Dennis.
Do look for our DVD of The Savage Innocents. At the end we sing a chorus of "The Mighty Quinn."
Not sure when my UK/LApiece is running but y'all will be the first to know.
I remember sometime in the early 80's picking up one of their 12" single releases and was totally transformed into....what? More Tosh than Tosh. The early Wall of sound (noise?) music of the Assocates were fantastic. It was like if Spike Jones somehow got into the body of a young opera singer who was obsessed with Bowie's croon. There - that is the perfect definition of the early MacKenzie sound.
For those who don't know his work, check out the early Associates (with Alan Rankin, the good lookin' one) and then go forward.
I am presuming that Billy was manic/depressive and the music really displays this polar existence. One moment it's the sweetest melody and then the next it's a traffic jam with the most beautiful voice fighting against the chaos.
He also handles 'covers' masterfully. His version of Sparks 'Don't Turn Your Back on Mother Nature' is a beauty and his raw recording of "The Crying Game" is also another winner. I always felt it was odd that Bowie never ever mention (in the public) MacKenzie's work. I would think he would find it interesting - but his silence on him and his music is sort of a loud statement of some sort. Maybe because he can really do the 'Bowie' thing without crawling to the master. His recording of "Arabia" and especially "Boys Keep Swinging" is sort of a strong statement on Bowie's aesthetic. It is almost like he's having a dialogue with the great pop artist.
When Billy MacKenzie died, he left a huge void in music for me. I am thankful for his family and friends who put out all this unrelased material out - most if not all are wonderful.
But again for the introduction go for the early stuff and go forward. The 'Perhaps' period maybe too 80's production sounding, but go beyond the production and listen to the lyrics and the tension between his words and the music.
Dennis thanks for putting this tribute together. I am going to spend tonight looking it over and hearing the material.
And don't forget Sparks. They're going to be awesome and will change the actual weather that is around you.
dennis,
perhaps paul curran's delightfully homo-erotic rallo entry will cheer you up? anal probes, cars that run on semen, what's not to love?!
RALLO
when i wrote the opening, i had a vague idea for what went down between maggie and simon that caused him to flip out. i won't share cuz i don't want to influence the path of the narrative, but it's really trippy how the story's proceeded since it could easily fit with the original idea! strange, huh?
i'm emailing the next writer now.
paradigm, I often wonder myself what my addiction to porn and occasional use of prostitutes adds up to in a artistic sense. I think when it comes to casual or relationship sex porn has made me very impatient about getting what I want. I want the girls I fuck to exactly what I want at the moment that I want them to. Afterall they do it all without bitching in porn.
It's getting to the point that I think I would be happier making porn than having girlfriends.
Hi all, my friend Jessica's putting out her literary journal called Pale House here in LA. It prints 1000 and has pretty good distribution. We were going over some of the submissions last night and so many are so academic in the wrong sort of way and generally flat. In hopes for its betterment, I couldn't help put put it out there to you guys, in case any of you have stuff you want to send in. It's fiction and poetry only. Short is good. You can see their site at http://www.palehousepress.com. Don't send them your work, though. Send it to me at williamsbett@yahoo.com
They're not taking any more submissions save for the ones I'm turning in. I don't have time to formally look them over and respond. If Jessica picks your piece or whatever, of course she will let you know. Okay, that's my shameless pitch to all you geniuses.
paradigm, i promise that you will remain on my munchable list, i absolutely promise you. my mum is on my munchable list and she was once a serious psycho. a serious psycho who was still utterly lovable and who never for one second did i think wasn't worthy of love. just don't worry about what i'll be thinking, please just don't worry about that. i know that you are but you shouldn't. if you knew me you would so understand, i just wish i could express it better.
david c, oh my god i'm getting increasingly stressed about how the fuck i got all of that violence in my mind. i mean, my mum was a psycho but not a violent psycho, so where the fuck has that come from? it's the fucking 'bone people' - i'm so sure it's that. anyway, thanks for reading - i'm just so chuffed that you are!
PS i've had a major, major lightbulb moment about what i'm going to write next. and it aint 'the dad'! (though i'm going to do that after this). it's actually going to be another academic book but i'm going to do it on the political economy of ... male prostitution. oh yes indeedy! i've been looking and looking and it's like no-one has really been written about that in my field. i just can't believe it, it's like it doesn't 'exist' or something. i just get so fucking sick of all the feminists in our department harping on about women being 'sex victims' and it's like (to sound like antonio) HELLO, about 1/5 all prostitutes in London are MALE. plus they're much more likely to be kids ... but in my field at least (political science) it's just totally not even acknoweldged. it's like 'gender issues' are 'women issues'. for fuck's sake, there is not just one gender! anyway, i just know exactly what i'm going to write about, i am just so fucking excited you can't believe it. david c i've got it in my mind that you've written about this sort of stuff too - can we get in touch or something? plus i'm going to need to get in touch with some hustlers in a serious way - help will be needed!
just been doing google scholar - there's hardly anything about male prostitution apart from fucking medical stuff about AIDS (i can't even bring myself to comment on that, it's not even worthy of a WTF). and in the political science literature prostitution is seems to be seen as 100% synonymous with 'women's issues. regarding which i AM going to indulge myself with one almighty WTF!!!!
ok well i seem to be the only one posting ... i've just heard from my lebanese friend, he's really fine and his family are fine too. but he says his country is just smashed to fuck and it's just devastating to see. but he's got this amazing job in the hague so at least that's something good he can focus on. anyway, it was just fantastic to hear from him - i really love him a lot, but i've just never really told him how lovely he is. it's just one of those things where you just feel so much love for someone but you can't really tell them because you're not really that 'close'. do you have people like that, that you just fall in love with (not in a sexual way) the minute you set eyes on them? anyway, he's one of those.
PS ho hum. i wish someone else would post.
hey Dennis - just to let you know that I got here ok. Bit of a scary second flight but I made it. Kentucky is just like I never left. Things are going well. Still adjusting to life here though. Take care... I'll be back again soon.
final post - dennis, we are all thinking of you and sending you love, everyone else has respected your wishes and not said anything and really i should do the same but it's just what we're all feeling and i can't stop myself from saying it.
I love porn! Prostitute, somehow doesn't mean much to a gay. We're all whores, something. A Mack day, yesterday, eh? Loved the Korine vids. Cycylolo_ got any more pics of those avitar boys? Jheorgge_ I love your musical tastes. Is that you, on your blog, sitting by the window? A very sexy boy.
Katsim_ Strange what holiness can be found deep in the Jefferson Forest. A part of me is lost somewhere about Paris.
Dennis,
You're the best. I owe you one, ok? Love love love
ok so i'm still posting! just been on the phone to one of my best friends in the whole world - she doesn't quite get my 'political economy of male prostitution' thing, she doesn't understand why i'd want to do it, but i still do ... i wish some other people would post ... 5stringsaphasia, i love that you love porn but i still just don't 'get' it, i just still feel so sorry for those kids, i can't stop seeing them as little kids, i know that's just missing the point but i can't ... i don't know if it's cos i need kids or something, or because i'm sentimental, but it just makes me so desperately sad, just really sad ... i don't know, i hope that doesn't sound wrong, it's just how i feel
Atheist_ I don't understand, but that's cool. I absolutely love porn. It becomes more and more, my main interest. Making a dollar is making a dollar. We're all naked and everything. Don't worry about it. I'm very, the younger the better...but, I'm one of those, "After your 15? you're not much good anyhow.", kind of guys.
aargh! katsim, i've just tried to leave a really long message on your blog and it's deleted it! it was just basically to say (a) i'm really glad you've had a relatively safe trip, we've been worrying about you and (b) i hope creativemassacre is ok, i get the feeling she's been feeling really down about herself and i hope she's ok. anyway, beautful K, you've really been missed!
PS mizu, are you ok beautiful girl? you've been missed too!
5stringsaphasia, i know i know! i wish i could stop being so fucking sentimental! why am i so sentimental about sex? it just makes me want to cry. i see those kids on DC's site and i just want to cry and cry ... but that is just being so fucking patronising and condescending and just not seeing their dignity ... i just wish i could 'get' it, i just can't ... i just wish i could feel true respect for the people involved but i just can't at the moment, i think eventually i'll be able to see it, i just need to keep on posting
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Atheist_ I would comfort you or something, but I'd probably just be trying to have sex with you, so...j/k =)
5stringsaphasia, that would be great! seriously, just anything apart from this fucking sentimental bullshit i'm feeling! just post anything, anything at all!
AMP was very insane! I so remember the early days of 120 minutes. Weird to realize that you were part of that whole thing. I didn't read you until my first year at U. I remember reading a webpage about you and then getting Period. I remember when reading it, the feeling of new strength. It soon became actual. Thank you_
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well I guess what I was thinking was that maybe we could all pair up either randomly or by predeliction (sic)and one person does maybe the words and the other the photos. It could almost be done as a series of experiments in the style I.e One 'set' (composing 3-4 stories or scenes) where the captions are given to the artist to illustrate,build around, subvert through the photographs (which could be made or found or a combination)and another set where the photos come first and the captions second and maybe a third 'blind' set where the different pairs have discussed a possible theme or aesthetic priorly and then gone away to create independently
I thkn it'll be interesting to see the different results of these approaches. Another possibility is if we put it over a few days (obviously not back to back but spread apart) where each pairing went through the 3 different types of approach.
I dunno if it doesn't sound a bit too ambitious or if it'd even work or if the way ive described it is lame and obviously it'd take quite a commitment from everyone involved so yeah ummm if anyones interested then email me at t.pkendall@hotmail.co.uk and i'll try and guage response from there or something. I just think its a pretty cool form playing around with stills and stuff and its really interesting in respect to I dunno the absence of movement? im dumb now I think. Chest keeps hurting. Twenty four and on a verge of a heartattack.
on an aside: hey nickolas! Where you at?
hey teenage kicks what ya doin?
hey c. im really disorganized but i wanna continue with what we were tryinh before just gotta get a bit healthy first.
ok love to everyone
Thanks for the great Billy Mackenzie day! I've been wanting to know more about him and the Associates since since reading about them just last week in Simon Reynold's RIP IT AND START AGAIN. So talk about your perfect timing. You have a favorite Associates album? Or recommended starting place?
Completely unrelated - but has anyone here watched THE INVASION OF THUNDERBOLT PAGODA? Arthur magazine just released it on DVD and I thought it was incredibly mindblowing. I don't usually go for hippie shit, but this is so far beyond the pale that I couldn't do anything but gawk with sheer wonder. It's like a cross between Inauguration of the Pleasuredome and Jack Smith's restaging of the Rig Veda. The score by original VU drummer Angus MacLise is spectacular as well. Any other reactions to it?
chilly jay chill- I'm gonna buy that DVD for sure- I missed Thunderbolt Pagoda at the Whitney Biennial (tho I saw Cameron Jamie's awesome Krump movie). There's a new soundtrack for it by Sunburned Hand of the Man, which is also a huge pull for me.
5stringsaphasia- thanx! :-)
hrmph - yeah ballet. my mum danced for the joffrey, then founded a dance studio where we lived at the time in cheyenne, wyoming. so to be an active child who detested sports, i was enrolled there for years doing different kinds of dance including ballet. there are some videos of performances but i don't have them, the studio does...hahaha i'd be afraid to see them now actually. ballet itself is inexplicable, eh? invented by bored french artisocrats. odd stuff. used to be fucking obsessed with Nijinsky. read his diary?
anyhoo, ja, a grant. yes i may prompt you in the future - I dunno now it's all so unknown. I feel like I need this grant to get started, and unless otherwise specified, I usually don't see them inviting a rec.
I LOVE DOLLS. more research.
xLuka
hey atheist - yeah, she probably was feeling pretty down about herself and life, but I think that's all getting better now :)
I had to leave your book at home but I still have the email so I'll finish it while I'm here, maybe I'll persuade creativemassacre to read it too.
How have you been? (I don't really have time to trawl through the past few days comments!) Hope you're ok.
dennis, here's a little story...
ok, let's see if i can make this short....over the weekend a st8 boy was in one of the yahoo rooms, he lost a bet and his friends said he had to mooon a gay guy on cam...any takers? i messaged him, haha!
saw his cute ass for a second or 2...then a friend of his messaged me..."did he do it?" i said yes, nice ass, etc...told him i didn't see any dick, tho. then the boy, "clay" came back, said now he had to show mw some cock...ok....THEN his friend again, asking all sorts of questions...size, was he hard, etc.
then later that night clay was talking to me again, ohhhhh, these st8 boys..."was it ok? how would you rate it?" etc etc etc...
well, of course, by the end of the night he was back with a boner...i saw THAT coming a mile away! we had a few long talks...he wouldn't show me his face, tho.
and back the next night..."i wasn't that hard, i just want you to see it really hard..." umm-hmmm. then he wanted to see mine, of course, so we played for a few minutes. showed me his hole..."oh this is weird, never thought i'd be doing this", etc etc etc. he was really enjoying showing off.
really, a great ass.
ANY guy likes to hear his junk looks good.
st8 boys, sheesh!
anyway, that was all amusing. i THINK he got it out of his system...
MK
dennis - thanks for saving us the chubby rolls.. that made me laugh.. i'm a complete mackenzie virgin (only passing knowledge of the associates) so i look forward to this.. cheers fella.
and if that moon doesn't change soon i'm personally sticking a giant firework up my arse and crashing into it
paul corran - excellent rallo installment
“Do you like yourself, Simon?”
“I like my room.”
fantastique.. and wouldn't the world be a better place if cars ran on semen!
t.pekndall - great ideas.. would be a bitch to manage but if you're up for it i'm game! :)
Dennis - you're expecting too much of yourself!
(You've no idea how difficult it was for a blowhard like me to condense and delete all those paragraphs I wrote into that - but you did say...)
(OK one PS - my favourate blogs are
the ones where we spill our guts - and most of us have in some fashion. As M.O.C - why should you be exempt! Spill away when necessary - disappear like Antonio and the rest of us for a while -so what? The world won't stop spinning. You expect too much of yourself. I would say 'typical work-driven Capricorn' but I know it would annoy you. So I won't.
(I saw Quentin Crisp in Edinburgh in 1978 - one small room - You walk in and think, who'se that old man sitting in a chair in the middle of the room sipping whisky? - And it was QC of course. His first line: "I have been forbidden from describing tonight's festivities as 'Straight talking from a bent speaker'. So I won't.")
Oh and if it makes you feel any better - (ie yippee an excuse for me to moan!) I've been having one physical problem after another recently - eyes/teeth (entire fillings falling out)/now the most horrendous cold-flu - like my lungs and heart are fucked enough anyway from pneumonia when I was two - those cold draughty Glasgow tenements) - so coughing is like chest pain/throat pain/headache).
Oh a good old Scottish moan.That's better...
I've just gone through every link and video on the Billy MacKenzie day. Totally brill - such a comprehensive account of Oor Wullie (jax and jheorgge will get that) and it brought back so many memories - God I was almost weeping: those records were great 'message' present material - I can trace boyfriends' affections (or lack of) from the dedications on 12" versions of '18 Carat love Affair' to 'Party Fears Two'. (I've just looked them up and - what with seeing those old Top of the Pops videos - am near paralysed with nostalgia).
What I love most about MacKenzie is the - is it minor chords? - I know diddly about musical terms - but it's the melancholy of say 'Breakfast' . I mean it's that stark echoey 'European' cold Scott walker/Nico/Lou Reed's Berlin/Bowie's Low/Station to Station/Heroes thing.
And that voice.To do covers of songs that others had done perfectly - Bowie's Wild is the Wind/Boy George - Crying Game (well I heard BG's version first, don't know when they were recorded).
Bloggers should watch the documentary if only to be reminded that things were still pretty great even after the death of punk. In fact I re-listen to a lot more stuff from that era than punk - I have to do a TOTAL punk day or nothing - Punk is so egotistical it refuses to compromise or share the stage with anyone else - I mean how can you listen to just ONE Ramones record ? How can you put on The Sex Pistols 'Bodies' then switch to - well anything other than another Pistols song?
Where was I ? Oh yes Morrissey and Billy would have made a great couple - Steven so shy and 'come and get me/I'm not moving' (ending in a darkened underpass / And Then Home - not!) and Billy so - well the number of (male) friends of mine who've been chased round a room by Billy McK...(they all 'succumbed').
And wasn't that Alan Rankine on that cover? I mean I thought Billy was attractive but Alan then - well you can see the Lennon/McCartney undercurrent).
There was a thing on Brit TV last night about Manic Depression (surely Billy's problem) by Stephen Fry (also bipolar) - Carrie Fisher was on it and has such a cookie house - chandeliers hanging from trees etc . So adorable - (I have a theory that people like her marry gay men because WE seek THEM out not the other way about - I mean look at Liza's last). But also they were playing the soundtrack to The Hours by Philip Glass all the way through - which really gets to me and I was wondering - here's the connection - if that's 'minor key' like a lot of Billy's stuff? My question, for those blogger musicians is, what is it that I like about this stuff? Is there a technical term for it? Other than(a 'writer' s term ) melancholy?
Atheist - good you've got ideas for other things. If no 'dad' yet -are you ready to send The Novel (what is the title now?) out - say to your novelist friend's agent ?
It's time!
You've taken all the really difficult steps - and look at the reactions...
Chilly Jay - starting place - those videos DC had links to - Party Fears Two/Club Country/Breakfast/Take me To the Girl/Those First Impressions.
But really you should buy 2004's The Associates:the singles.
Oh and I hope Dennis if you get to Scotland in May or me and jax get to London before then you watch that doc again to aclimatize yourself to the accent - English folk can't understand me, let alone Americans - jax in fact sounds a bit like Billy Mck - though he probably doesn't hear it.
rigby -what's your star sign? - or better still , date of birth? -you can email that... though you're way younger than me (48) -I've never understood why that's a secret - age...
i've always overlooked the associates for some reason, they were usually liked by my older friends whose taste in music i didn't generally share. but i'm now intrigued enough to pick up a record - anyone have a recommendation for the best place to start?
dennis, so far i have little nostalgia for the early 90s. all that music that i liked well enough at the time - pavement, sebadoh, nirvana, plus the shoegazing stuff we've covered earlier - doesn't seem to hold up so well in the light of hindsight.
it was always my dream, with the music i made and records i put out on my label, to be involved in some pivotal movement or point in time. i started the label in 1992 at the height of the whole lo-fi thing, but now that seems like a cul-de-sac. maybe that's what keeps me releasing music, the hope that i might stumble onto something people will look back on and mythologise. pretty stupid, i know!
these days i seriously wonder if there's any future in independent record labels, what with itunes, soulseek, cd-rs etc. i sell about half what i used to only five years ago...it's such a big part of my self-image though, i'm not sure what i could replace it with if i had to stop.
That feeling that someone's burning the black candle on you sucks.
I've never understood the attitudes that make the laws that create the dangerous black market enviroment that surrounds drugs and prostitution.
Dennis & CO:
You're right Dennis - we all should be so lucky to do what we actually want, without restrictions. But I think this is a lot of the reason for such a wealth of crappy indepedent film - not because there aren't people with visions, it's just that it's harder and harder to get that out there without it being compromised beyond all recognition. Quite unsettling.
KATSIM:
So, you're from Kentucky and have just moved back? Whereabouts in KY? I grew up there myself. I hated it at the time, but I've come to appreciate it a lot more - now that I'm not there.
TIGERSARE:
Macauly is hot in that video, isn't he? I love the part with him licking his lips in slo-mo. Apparently Korine desperately wanted to get him to do the video but thought he never would. But he called him up and he agreed.
And what about Rachel Miner, his then-wife? Surely I'm not the only one who loves her? Her performance in Larry Clark's Bully is unbelievable - she's like a teenage Lady Macbeth. It's so sad she hasn't been put to good use since (well, that whole cast really - Brad Renfro? Bijou Philips! God, I love Bijou).
5STRINGAPHASIA:
Don't let Cage's presence prevent you from seeing Wild At Heart - he's perfectly cast in it, and his current work is a far cry from his performance. It's definitely a must-see.
VOMITINGGHOSTS:
For some reason, people seem to think that because digital isn't 35 it's automatically worse, which I find puzzling. You're right - it is obvious that they're different, yet people seem to want to compare them as if they're the same. It's completely nonsensical. I'm shocked to hear you say that Lost Highway leaves you with too many answers - you must be the only person I have ever heard express such a sentiment. I always felt that Lost Highway is one of Lynch's more impenetrable films, and it's actually one of the reasons that I like it better than Mulholland Dr. (which I do think actually provides you with a lot of answers). How creepy is it watching Robert Blake in that movie after watching his trial? He totally murdered his wife. Did you know that Blake showed up on set to LH dressed like that? With no eyebrows and that kabuki make-up. No one told him to do that, and the make-up people were freaking out until Lynch said "It's perfect! Stay that way!"
LUKA:
What don't you like about Dumbland? I think it's brilliant. I love the simple black and white aesthetic, and I also find it wildly funny in a stupid, vulgar way.
ATHEIST:
Yeah, people either feel my Gallo obsession or not. But I'll use any excuse to talk about him!
JHEORGGE:
Isn't that final episode of TP amazing? It really pissed people off initially, too - it was so open ended. I know that Lynch has said that of everything he's shot, the Red Room scenes are his favorite. Glad to see some love for the movie, too. It's so unjustly maligned. I think it's one of his better films, too.
XOXO
d
K Luka
i love to dance a lot
karsavina
Pavlova
Nijinsky
there is this dvd
a friend let me with all this amazing
films from the Kirov
and the Bolshoi....
My obssesion is The death of the Swan...
and all the cubist dances modernes
seen by the clasics.
Faberge eggs in Russia
Ice and broken glass
vodka pirouettes
over LouisXIV palace floors...
Isadora's dream
Beheaded foulard in a Bugatti
Chemisse du force for Nij...
le spectre de la Rose..
glisse glisse...
tpk yes
and didn't understand anything you said but never do anyway so ok i just in my normal state of ignorance just do it if it doesn't mean revealing me
Dennis love you like my mother loves cold peaches Dennis love you like my dad loves testicles and fists Dennis love you like my lovers love other people Dennis love you like listening to music in pain and then feeling victorious Dennis love you like imagining you'll die in a good way Dennis love you like walking around outside in underwear and flipping off the neighbors with your erect dick Dennis love you like movies you love when you watch them with someone you love and they love them too Dennis love you like unexpected Dennis love you like the ice-cube feeling on your crotch when you see him cum Dennis love you like a mouthful of boy Dennis love you like pink on nipples Dennis love you like reading Dennis for the first time
no reply to this or embarrassed
ok
C.
c.
i just watched the videos... wow!
wow!
oh dennis i forgot to mention you saved my life with frisk... i was at that point.. you helped me to see reality.. love you for that.. cheers again
mills - are you taking the piss? its lybra.. the only non animal zodiac.. so are we going steady now?
"I have a theory that people like her marry gay men because WE seek THEM out not the other way about - I mean look at Liza's last"
Errrr (that's a big Andy "Errrr" complete with twisted facial expression to go with it) No.
Women marry gay men because they're heat-seeking missiles of self-regard. Carrie Fisher claims not to have known the father of her daughter was gay. But the only men she ever hangs out with (save for her marriage to Paul Simon - the exception that proves the rule) are gay. She's a bigger Fag-Hag than her own mother and rivals Elizabeth Taylor in her stimaina!
A gay Republican od'd in her bed last year -- and she was asleep right next to him!!!!
As for Liza, well . . .
According to Andy jack Haley Jr. was straight, so that's ONE! She has had affairs with several straight menincluding Barishnilov, Marty Scorsese, and Dezi Arnaz Jr. But what Liza wants is the same thing Diane Von Fursentenberg has -- a successful gay marraige.
shit c that was beauty full
backwards
backwards
Paradigm:
how nice to hear that you enjoy my text
I will love to have more time to get deeper in
this blog world totally
overlayered
like a russian doll too
infinite
I meet some Melbournians
wile in berlin
they have a band
called
the split lips
the drummer is a sweet girl
called
LWren
they sound abit brithday party bauhaus murphy but
fresh energy too..
Did you weare english school uniform?
haha what a ridiculously sexy day!! i am in desperate need of some associates right now but ME BEING SO KIND AND BEAUTIFUL, i loaned out like HALF of my albums to one of my professors because her ipod broke.. and she was in need of some hot music to upload.
SAD...
so ive been making do with Geogaddi, Closer, and Unknown Pleasures.. i guess those are what i consider my desert island discs..
DUDES!!!!!
hmm anyways.. i have nothing else to say today..
LOVE AND KISSES FAGFACES!!!
oh yeah!!!! im SO reading METAPHYSICS right now!! its fucking ridiculous.. i always understood the general outline of aristotle's thought.. but METAPHYSICS IS BASICALLY.... insane? yeah.. maybe its just my translation.. hmm..
ALSO!!
man, im also reading SO MUCH poetry!!!! Dennis you once said that you totally dont understand how poetry isnt the choice medium of today's writers.. i SO DONT KNOW WHY EITHER!?! i think you talked about MTV ADD consciousness and stuff.. i agree.. anyways.. im totally ADD.. and have been writing so much poetry.. mainly because everyone here is SO into writing.. and ive never done it.. until now.. SO THANKS DUDES!!!
theres this really hot pic of Ginsberg and Olovsky in my avedon book! it sorta turns me on!
alright i gotta go to sleep
c that was so beautiful ...
rigby, i can so understand, if frisk saved your life MLT saved mine ...
joeM hmm well harpercollins is her publisher, i don't think they'd be into rentboys being beaten up by their dads - but you are so, so wonderful and amazing to give me so much encouragement all the time, i just thank god i sent it to you all those weeks ago - thank you!!
C
to see your words here
like a blossom rose
drip my heart
of hearing of love
as love pure
deep inside you
all is there
roses heads sleepy in my hands
weigth dormant
flowers of love
hold the head of a rose
carefully
to not break her heart..
les enfants du paradise
les enfants terribles
O de conduite
hansel und grettel
chocolate house...
the witch is saying nice things wile
her stomach is empty
and the kids know..
all that chocolate...
could be for them?
trust the chocolate?
lost in the forest
fear and hungry?
conquered by love
i'm being thoughtless and irresponsible about a lot of things lately. maybe by announcing this i can change this trend after some sleep tonight.
yeah, somebody gave me that spike jonze dvd, that was my favorite. The band was Wax and the song was California i think.
ignacio, i'm so sure that's not true but i really hope you feel better in the morning all the same xx
Dear Dennis,
"There is no such thing as a problem without a gift for you in its hands. You seek problems because you need their gifts."
-- From ILLUSIONS: THE ADVENTURES OF A RELUCTANT MESSIAH by Richard Bach (maybe not the best book in the world, but this quote once appeared to me when I needed it to)
Much love,
garrison
I love how atheist always does multiple "this is my last post" posts.
__'more Tosh than Tosh': that's brilliant. i know exactly what you mean Tosh. i became 'more Math than Math' when i first heard Ludus [whose releases are now issued by Crepuscle where Alan Rankine works].
__tigersare, so far as an Associates starting point, like Tosh said, Party Fears Two and Love Boat [their 2 biggest hits] are on Sulk, a total synth masterpiece. i heard that album first and it's what made me fall in love with The Associates. Tosh's recommendation to start w/ the more guitar-based debut LP The Affectionate Punch is also totally solid.
there is a decent comp out there if you're into that sort of thing... for awhile it was the only Associates thing in print; now that all the album reissues are out i see the comp turning up really cheap like maybe $2-3 secondhand... ummm someone aid me i believe the comp is called 'Popera'?
xo, math+
ps: does anyone here like Kasabian? the band not the Manson family getaway driver.
hey d, i love bijou too, can't remember mac's wife in bully too well, but have you seen Tart? it's a straight to video classic featuring the whole could-a-been brat pack - renfro (hottest of the hot), bijou, mischa 'OC' barton, dominique swain and even melanie griffiths (who i totally started to love after cecil b demented, this and the larry clark movie she's in). bijou is totally amazing in that movie, especially when she takes a shit in the icebox...i wonder whatever happened to her? her album didn't do all that well, did it?
Time for me to put on my 'older brother' hat and let you all know that the original version of "The Crying Game" was made and recorded by Dave Berry. A stunning beautiful record. Dennis do you remember him while watching Shindig?
He's basically a R & b Singer with pop overtones like a lot of early 60's british singers. But his live show was kind of campy. What he would do is move very slow on the stage and play with his mike in a very suggestive way. The actor (actress) in The Crying Game was imitating him in the film while singing this song.
Berry would not face the camera during the instrumental solo and sort of drag his mike very slowly down his back. His hand around the butt area would catch the mike.
If you have seen the Dylan film "Don't Look Back" the Animals keyboard player Alan Price talks about Dave Berry's stage act to people in Dylan's dressing room. He imitates him in front of Dylan. Dylan looks bored. Wrong! Dylan should have paid more attention to Dave Berry!
I am going to have to get that Ludus CD. Linder, the lead singer and main hancho in that band just put out an art book of all of her collages, photos, etc. It's a nice book.
Also the Billy Mackenzie stuff is so great. I haven't had the chance to go through the links yet - but his recordings are part of my DNA at this point. His death was so tragic and such a lost. It's really hard to replace a singing voice that is so unique and powerful. There are maybe somebody out there that can sort of sound like that - but it's not the same.
I think growing old and putting out something amazing like Scott Walker's new one is the best bet. Never lose that edge, respect your boundries, push it when you can and look at the quality of one's work. Never stop trying to expand yourself via your skills and vision. And even when it is dark out there, look at what you or one has produced in this time - and though the artist may suffer, he or she brings beautiful fruit to the table. That takes hard work and vision. Maybe time too.
I think Billy had it, and when he killed himself he betrayed his fans. I shouldn't say something like that. But the proof is the recordings he left behind and the stuff he was workling on during the time of his death. All of it was something special, unique, and smart. He still had a lot of work to do - and the little that was left is pretty amazing. Whatever the pain was that killed Billy, his art was stronger then that.
Wow, finally - I tried to post all day yestreday, but my connection was fucked meaning that the verification words were refusing to appear:(
Gawd..I didn't even know Billy McKenzie was dead! Poor abstards - but those manic depressive ones are all alike. You;d think he;'d have hung around for the whippets, if nothing else:)
I do remember him getting glasses shoves in his face, but.
Interesting coment on 'bertaying one's fans', Tosh. You think the artist has an obligation to stay alive for our entertainment?:)
No, I'm joking - I know what you're saying. Persnally, I think there's anotehr kind of artist that knows he;s not said all he wants to say and is DRIVEN to keep on trying to say it, regardless of personnal circumstances.
Take care Dennis, eh?
Dennis,
Thanks so much for Billy Mackenzie Day. I asked you if I could do a Christian Vander/Magma Day a little while ago, but I quickly deleted the comment because I'm certain you'd say yes, so it was silly to ask. I'll just get to work on it and send it your way soon.
Antonio- Thanks for the add at myspace. I love 'Das Geist Haus'.
Anyone here who hasn't seen/heard Das Geist Haus should follow the link above.
Chilly Jay Chill- 'The Invasion of Thunderbolt Pagoda' is out on DVD?! Thanks for the tip.
I've never really thought of Ira Cohen as a hippie, although I guess he kind of is. But he's the uber hippie! He's so psychedelic you could probably trip by eating his fingernail clippings.
Ira Cohen is one of my favorite poets/photographers/etc. I'm sure he'll be one of my favorite filmmakers also after I watch Invasion of Thunderbolt Pagoda.
Have just walked past our dumb waiter/book lift - to see jean beclad legs with boxer shorts peeping over them hanging out (the repair person was sitting inside). It felt like a real "Dennis moment". Quite sexy out of the lift as well! So just had to share.
Math - re: Kasabian. A soon as I read you mention this band I had to write something. DON'T LISTEN TO THEM!!!! They are the antithesis of beauty, of wit, of imagination!!! Big, swaggery Lads who believe the only good band of the last 20 years were Oasis and Stone Roses and spit cheap lager at 'faggots'. Their inexplicable popularity in the UK has given clans of men out for a fight new songs to chant...I implore you, for my sake if not yours, AVOID!!!
...
I realise you didn't say you liked them btw, but I thought that was where it was going.
DENNIS, btw, cheers so much for this day. I have never, until yesterday, heard any of this stuff, through either putting it off, or it simply not occuring to me. I d/lded Four Drawers Down and The Affectionate Punch yesterday, read the interview here, watched the videos...and am now converted fully! So if the point of the day was to bring Mackenzie into someone's life, well, you've done it here, so thank you, and take good care.x
David E - you are so politically incorrect! Well Re:Carrie F - we're gay but not female - maybe she just didn't know her husband was gay - she's spilled so many wonderful things in her novels - why wouldn't she spill that one ? I don't know.
C: "Dennis love you like movies you love when you watch them with someone you love and they love them too "
You're such a beautiful writer -all,that stuff you say about not feeling part of this - I don't feel part of this - there is no archetypal DC blogger-DC probably feels alientated some times. But there is a connection - that's why we keep coming back.
rigby - Libra - that's what I thought ! Really - we're definitely going internet steady now - Can't wait for The Ball...
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