p.s. Jesus fucking Christ, there's more than 140 comments here. A new record, obviously. Wow, thanks. Now, on the other hand, hopefully you're all happily talking to each other back in there -- I haven't looked yet -- because there's no way in the world can I interract with all these posts today. So if I don't get to some people, which is pretty much guaranteed considering I have limited blog time today, forgive me. Main thing is, thanks for doing whatever you doing in there on my blog. Yikes. Now, big cheer for math tinder's extraordinary Day, okay? Pretty great, no? Thanks a ton, mt. Now I'll dig into the comments as best I can. ** Adjoun, Yeah, Lautreamont's a big influence from way back in my teens. ** Lost child, You reached ever higher heights yesterday. ** Paul america, No problem, man. Listen, as a Day building veteran, I know the difficulties. Whenever it comes I'll be thrilled, as will this lot. thanks for the update. ** Math tinder, Thanks again for this masterpiece. Nice Jobriath stuff. I smoke (when I'm able to) Camel Wide Lights. Since they're not sold here in France, I smoke the vastly inferior Camel Blue (the European Camel Lights). ** Atheist, Congrats on the new niece. One more presumably weird, cool kid in the world, awesome. ** Katsim, Oh, see, that's an interesting take on myspace. I'll try to check out the mag. Oh, you're on your way to the US! You must report in from the States at first light, okay? Wanna know you're okay, your thoughts, etc., you know. ** David ehrenstein, If you read this before interviewing John, and it's appropriate, pass along my respects. I've never met him, but I think we have mutual friends. Anyway, whatever, enjoy each other. You're friends with Kirby Dick? I haven't seen him in yonks, but we were/are friendly. He's great, yeah. And he did that sweet docu on my great, late friend Bob Flanagan. ** Creative massacre, Someone probably has a lengthier, more thoughtful take on the Christian obsession with Heavy Metal, but I assume it's just the genre's fondness for Satanic imagery, references, and acoutrement crossing wires with the paranoia, delusional states, and questionable IQs of hardcore Christians. ** Larkspur, Thanks a lot for the film festival report. The Resnais, Bertolucci/Pasolini are now on my must-see list. Interesting the Aronofsky sucks. I sort of figured. ** Perspects, Great, I'm going to hunt down every shred of recent Eric Gaffney? You've heard his new stuff? What do you think? ** Antonio, You were around a lot this weekend, and in top form, I might add. Coming back to the blog on Monday is always kind of a weird experience, sort of maybe like a guy who says to his friends, Sure, you can have a party at my place while I'm wherever I am, and then he when he comes back, there's nobody there, but there's all this stuff: Derrida books, Vincent Gallo DVDs, piles of weird drugs, baby clothes, airline tickets, uh ... used condoms, scribbled notes to me scattered around, etc., and other stuff, and then he's like an archeologist and his house is like an Egyptian temple or something. Or not. I don't know what I'm saying. Anyway, it's strange. Dude, you know I am so totally there on the buying Halloween costumes front. If I was rich, and I was in America, I would buy so much Halloween stuff you can't even imagine. Do you have those yearly Halloween stores where you are -- these huge stores of only Halloween stuff that only open for a month a year? There's a bunch of them in LA. I get so excited in those places I have to hold onto the shelves when I walk around because my knees go weak. Anyway ... ** Jheorgge, Oops and, at the same, no surprise on the badness of 'The Black Dahlia.' Thanks for saving me the 9 euro or whatever. ** Michael karo, New pix. I'll go have a look. Cool. Red faced I will admit I was a reasonably passionate Yes fan up to a certain, early point only. 'Tales of Topographic Oceans' killed it. I met my first boyfriend Julian while sleeping overnight at the Forum in LA to get Yes concert tickets, so they had a purpose. That newspaper article is great. The first time I read your post, I thought it was three girls who dug up the cute dead girl, and I was really excited then. But it beings boys is still interesting. Plus, the next time I do necrophilia, I'm definitely going to do it in Wisconsin. So thanks for the tip. ** D., Welcome back. Look forward to having you around more. Liked your back and forth about Vincent Gallo. ** Joe mills, Me and Bowie share a strange psychological problem? Well, that explains a lot. You took that photo of that soap dispenser in your own bathroom, didn't you? Fess up. ** Dynmoose, Very glad your kid's allright, but I am quite concerned about the Weavie thing. I mean that sounds serious. I hope he gets his shit together and has that checked. Do tell when there's news on that, okay? ** Statictick, Like I just said to dynomoose, I'm a bit edgy about this Weavie thing. I hope you're okay. ** Rigby101, Great posts. ** Jeff, Hey. Sorry about the computer problems. Sure, obviously, you can do Ulver Day first. Whatever interests you and seems like the most doable and fun. An honor. Yeah, Blanchot, he's my man. Karl Kraus ... now that's an interesting idea. Karl Kraus Day, hm. Daunting, and yet ... Let's see. ** Mizu, christopher michael stamm, Hi! ** Jax, Edwyn Collins was never a fetish object of mine until you mentioned his mouthy, snide, very fey qualities, and, sure enough, ... boi-i-ing. ** Will, Nice. ** 5stringaphasia, Your back and forth with david e. on Derrida was cool. I fear I'm in the fan of Derrida camp. Not that he's a God to me like Blanchot or Bataille or whoever else. But then I have a European and especially French philosophy/theory fetish. It's like porn to me. Not that it gives me a boner. I just like reading it kind of indiscriminately, getting lost in it, scratching my chin and going 'hm, that's quite true' or 'hm, interesting point, not that I agree' or etc. while I'm reading it. Plus, you can get some really good writing/prose/setence structure ideas sometimes. But whatever. It don't matter. ** C., That words/sluts/whores thing is really brilliant. ** Paradigm, 'We Have to Talk About Kevin': I'm almost sure I read that, though I don't remember anything about it. I always read books when they have titles like that, i.e. 'I Know My Name is Steven.' And yeah, scrolling through here today with one eye on the clock is intense, though, now that I'm almost the bottom, I have to say it was one of the best deays here ever in quality as well as quantity. ** Oh, I am at the bottom. Well, luckily you guys were engaged mostly with each other and not me, but I still feel like I skimped today in my responses. Oh, well, I'll make it up to you, etc. Enjoy the Day, tell its brilliant creator what you think, and see ya.
posted by Dennis Cooper at 2:36 AM
64 Comments:
Thank you mathtinder for a fascinating and interesting day. Wow - we are truly thankful.
Hi Dennis - loved your description of Monday's return to this blog. Thats how I feel like a few days away - all this stuff has goem on in my absence and everyones talking about something that I missed at the time - madness.
But, now, its time for my LA plea - to all you lost angels out there! I'll be in the concrete city itself from 8th to 10th of October so any ideas about must-sees, any exhibitions, gigs, anything thats on that you think I should experience in my short stopover please do let me know.
Oh, a PS to mathtinder - the crystals are to make jelly for a birthday party (bouncey castle also included!). So, nothing particularly interesting I'm afraid.
Very cool day, Math - I thoroughly applaud the concept of research chemicals. What little drug-using I did was of the 'My mate says take six of these with a can of Fanta' variety, so while the pics of all those lovely wee compounds you use as illustration reminds me more of chemistry class than enjoying a narcotic good time, being aware of what you take is probably safer than being your own guinea pig.
Anyone ever do cough medicine? Decongestants? or have the taken all the cool stuff out of over-the-counter medicines by now?
Anyone ever see God while on anything?:)
Fucking brilliant day, Math - I wish I knew what you were talking about (cos I've never taken any drugs - well, just about one grain of speed once, that's it! Well, and poppers - they were ace! Well, also a spliff quite a few times. But no 'proper' drugs - I'm jealous!)
Fantastic job, Math Tinder. You really covered so much and put it together with great passion and clarity, along with that excellent anecdote. I hope you do come up with a longer work some day. Years ago I took whatever drugs were available (none of these RCs) but it was totally uncontrolled. I have a lot of respect for intelligent drug use.
paul curran, did you get my email about rallo? you're up next but i never heard back. drop me a line at bpmwriter@yahoo.com.
statictick, you haven't missed anything since rigby's post but the url is here
RALLO
bounce.
It is with great pride that I step down as the drug geek of the Cooper Blog and pass the scepter to Math Tinder. Cheers.
Apart from my daily potsmoking (I am a musician after all) and light social drinking I've pretty much settled on naturally occurring tryptamines as my trip of choice: psilocybes (mmmm), DMT freebase and various Harmine/tryptamine combos (ayahuasca, "psilo-huasca", etc.).
I stick to the McKenna credo of "infrequently in challenging doses" - twice a month is actually a lot for me, but it's kind of like a "degauss" button for my brain. The stresses of modern urban living rigidly compartmentalize everything in my mind and I need to demolish those walls every so often to keep me sane.
Furthermore, psilos are perfect for overcoming creative blocks. There are published studies that support this, not to mention my own firsthand experiences. I don't believe in magic or god or in things having a "purpose", but I think those little mushrooms belong in us. Some (mcKenna, et al) argue that psilos are responsible for the acquisition of language in primate evolution (the "monkey and the mushroom" theory) which is, of course shaky at best, but no less fun to think about.
Funny McKenna story: I was talking psychedelics with a cute boy who was tripping at a party a while back, and he asked what I thought of McKennas theory that "mushroom spores come from space". I said "Dude, we ALL come from space".
That blew his mind...
Yeah, I find that putting a "day" together has been very difficult. My "Bret Easton Ellis" day thing is going nowhere fast, and I'm not sure why. It probably doesn't help that my allergies/sinuses are out of control at the moment and I have trouble using the computer (or even keeping my eyes open) for long periods of time... I don't know, I'm just not feeling inspired. I'm finding it very hard to get my thoughts down in an organized manner, to avoid rambling or sounding like an obsessive fanboy, etc.
wow!
excellent day math.. if only my browser had a scratch-and-lick function ;)
dennis - love the coming back to the party bit.. hehe (sorry about the condom)
perspects - 'Dude, we ALL come from space' haha excellent you evil man ;)
Oh, BTW some very wonderful person who went to the Hoffman/LSD symposium in Basel a year ago, brought back a seed crystal of genuine Sandoz Delsyd LSD-25 and used it to make a large batch. There are now orange 250 mic tabs of authentic LSD around, which haven't been on these shores since the 60's
Most blotter is bunk, the difference is night and day, get it while you can.
math +
great job on the chemicals........in regards to dmt i wonder if you've heard it come up "have you seen the machines?"
Mathtinder, ....
Mindblowing, your approach to this subject. I knew several people, when I was in college, who always talked about "intelligent drug use", but none of them were ever as intelligent as this. Great post for a Monday, and this coming from Switzerland, the country that brought you Albert Hoffman and his LSD breakthrough.
Math+_ Thank you! Not an easy day, very well done.
Just say yes, to health, to being billions of years strong, beautiful, and free!
Dennis,
If Derrida has ever for one minute made you happy or anything, he is alright by me. I'm terribly pragmatist, rebuilding my brain currently. I hurt my "talkie" and stuff. I hope more and more people read your work. I can never thank you enough.
really hope weavie is ok by the way - lots of love xx
We are all from space, we're on a planet floating in space. Everything comes from space.
I apologize in advance for hogging bandwidth, but I'm compelled to chime in and supplement some of Math's facts:
On DMT:
DMT visuals are utterly unique and unlike any other psychedelic. Whereas acid trails are “ghosty” DMT trails are solid, intricate and constantly changing at breakneck speed. DMT is all about closed-eye visuals anyway: sharply rendered, infinitely detailed, interlocking psychedelic machinery that consistently turns into “entities” that hop around and chatter and look at you and appear to hand you other self-transforming machinery that turns into more “entities” (popularly referred to as “elves”). Then, just like that, they quickly say “g’bye!” and your back to ordinary reality.
One thing Math Tinder neglected to mention is that DMT (both nn-DMT and 5meo) is present in ALL mammalian tissue. That’s right we’re all holding. The intense realism at which learned reality collapses (“more real than real”) on DMT and it’s quick course of action (7-15 minutes for the peak of the trance, 10-20 minutes of “afterglow”), suggest it is metabolized quickly. Our bodies know exactly what to do with the stuff. To date no one has found a way to successfully amp up the production of their own endogenous DMT to have a drugless trip, but research continues.
The exact purpose of endogenous DMT is still being debated. In the 60’s (like all psychedelics) it was thought to have something to do with mental illness, but most experts now feel this is not the case. A recent interesting theory is that DMT is part of the “fight or flight” instinct. Which makes some sense in that it is almost universal that people under DMT see beings and faces emerge from the network of visuals. It’s like a calibrating device for our perception that allows us to detect the pair of eyes hidden in the bushes. Neat, huh?
As far as seeing the machines, once you’re there you can’t escape them. Don’t worry, though. They’re nice (mostly)
DMT has scared the holy hell out of many people, including our beloved Antonio. The thing to remember is set & setting (always). Anticipatory fear is part of it too, but you just have to surrender control and let it do what it wants, don’t try to control it or it will be hellish. Just let go, it’s totally the most beautiful thing anyone could ever experience. The Indians have known this for thousands of years.
thanks so much for this post! i used to do a lot of hallucinogens in high school, when for some reason you could find really good acid (geltabs, mostly, but on one memorable occasion- sugar cubes) in Miami, and then shrooms we'd pick at the farms outside College Town, but nothing in years.
This post taught me a lot, but also really reinspired me re intense psychedelic/psychotropic drugs, which as recently as yesterday I was telling somebody I didn't think I had the patience/passion to experiment with anymore. Hmmm.
Very cool stuff, math!
Been busy this morning with My longest FaBlog post EVAH!
good day math, My drug use thus far has mostly consisted of cocain pot and mushrooms, but I'm always looking to try new things. I find getting hooked up with a good dealer the most frustrating part. Which is why what I'm most interested in now is drugs I can grow and consume, morningglory sounds nice.
mizu, i think you were right about the dad stuff. i just don't think i can face writing a whole novel about that motherfucker! i've just been trying and trying and i end up just hating him more. so here's my idea: i'll see if i can incorporate that other stuff into the 'son' stuff and just pretend it's him writing about the dad ... well, i'm going to give it a go, i'll see if it works, if it doesn't it doesn't. but i've just totally got writer's block and i'm sick of it and the start of term is approaching and i want that fucker out of my head! anyway, thanks for the advice - as usual you were right all along!!!
Whoa... not "as usual", Atheist!! Try "hardly ever". But I can sympathize with you on the block. I'm still having trouble, too, and I'm trying to take your advice to me!
Just take a couple of days off from it, maybe, see if that helps. You can do it, just like you told me I can.
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dennis - i'm thrilled you're into blanchot.. have you done a day on him already?
atheist - why don't you just leave it for awhile.. let it simmer and then you'll come to the boil!
A - I thinks rigby's right about leaving it a while.
Also if you can't make him 'better' - maybe that's cos he is iredeemable.
When you return to it if there's no dad novel you could have a postscript from the dad - just creating doubt about the son's reliability - then another postscript from the mother undercutting him - so the reader is left to decide who to believe...
But you've already got a book so no hurry.
i used condom too but didn't really use it with anyone just between me and my hand because hand has been places you know both hands have been many places places i've never been able to call out or name places and doing things i don't really know how to mention without giving it meanings it doesn't have like shit = dirty but hand can't tell and semen = sex but hand can't tell and cock = faggot but hand can't tell so between me and my hands there are barriers of what they can do when i can't because my mind is more hesitant reticent you said my hands are more courageous but my brain moves on a wheelchair senile drooling but my hands grasp and hold and so between my hands are barriers and my hands don't like to tell my mind all the things they've done my mind would take a rope and bind them or maybe break them like dads who find you touching things you shouldn't touch so yes my mind is a dad who has to know what it doesn't know has to read more into than out of but my hands are very accepting my hands unstick themselves from my will and just stroll around so yes between me and my hands are barriers
math easy as cool thanks
ok
c.
mizu, you are ALWAYS right whenever i see anything you've written - you are such a wise soul it's unbelievable!
rigby and joeM - wow, thank you! i think maybe that's what i'll do, i.e. just leave it for a while. but it's just not 'flowing' at all for me at the moment, it's like my bloody academic writing all over again. so i think it's time to leave it and just forget about it for a while. but what i'm so, so happy about is that you maybe see him differently (i.e. joeM sees him one way, rigby sees him another way?) that makes me so fucking happy, i don't really know why it just does!! but thank you thank you thank you as always!!
Math, wow. I don’t even know what to say. What an extraordinary synopsis and introduction for anyone who doesn’t know much or has never heard of these drugs. Like I told you in some e-mails, Pihkal was an incredibly important book to me when I was in high school, even though I’ve never had the opportunity or really, the inclination to try any of these chemicals. But it’s one of those books that I discovered at the exact right time in whatever identity development was happening with me at the time. It is such a beautiful book (yeah, with pretty non-exciting cover art, though I’m very affectionate towards it since it’s such a big part of my experience with the book, too). I wish I had it here with me right now, actually. I just moved into a new apartment last month and most of my books are still at my parents’ house. That book Tripping edited by Charles Hayes is on its way in the mail with a few other books I’ve been starving to break into lately.
I was looking through Tripping online at Amazon and found this really beautiful passage from it about the terrors of the psychedelic experience that I thought I’d share because for me, part of the attraction to hallucinogens (even though, again, I’ve never done any) is the potential mind-fuck for life. That ever-present danger that somehow you’ll go too far:
“Indeed, the psychedelic can pull the old switcheroo, turning on you after starting out on a soft and beatific note. Such an about-face may seem like a trick or something more sinister, a function of some hellish private twilight zone. (Aptly enough, Rod Serling himself, in a circa 1970 public-service spot, warned youngsters that the LSD capsule he held between thumb and forefinger could be an express ticket to the sort of turmoil and alienation he immortalized in his classic television show.
Just as you might feel baptized and cleansed by a beatific archetype, so too can you feel charred and singed by a negative one, as if the mark of Cain has been branded into you. In the film version of Paddy Chavefsky’s Altered States [1980], the sensory-deprived protagonist Eddie Jessup (William Hurt) has a horrifying hallucination of himself nailed to a cross with a satanic goat’s head over his own—flailing vainly to break out of the damnation and the suffocation, as he drifts off through the infinity of the cosmos. Although the vision was not drug-induced, it echoed one of my own that had been, and thus had my heart pounding when I first saw it on the big screen.
The sublime side of the psychedelic experience is amply extolled in stories that relay the soaring joys of kissing the creatures of the sun, copulating with the galaxy, cleansing one’s callused heart in the clear blue stream of the Redeemer’s gaze, and other elations. For sure, the psychedelic can offer glimpses of heavenly radiance, but also of its shadows: awful plummets through flaming caves of pain, the moral vertigo that rips through your soul like some heinous phallic-vein out of Alien [1979] and tries to snuff you out. ‘…I cam loose from the sky,’ writes Ken Kesey in a story from Demon Box [1986], describing a steep fall he took from a chemical high, vexed by ‘the chilly hiss of decaying energy.’ The psychedelic can fray the tissues that hold your ego and self-esteem together, allowing you to sink into the loneliest, most inhospitable hole in your being, where you may find yourself cascading helplessly into the unholy depths of the human mind.”
Have you had any frightening experiences on any of these chemicals? I’m partly afraid and that’s why I haven’t actively tried to find acid or anything because I feel pretty fucked up anyway without drugs, and things are pretty intense sober anyway if you’re in the right place in your life creatively or whatever, which I feel like I’m at right now. But anyway. I just wanted to let you know how much I love the work you did here today. This is definitely one of my favorite curated days here on Dennis’s blog. There are tons of others but this one definitely stands out because it’s sort of got its claws in my interests right now and you’re really in-synch with how I’m feeling about all this. I love how you just included the chemical structures, too. For some reason I find that really poignant. So yeah. What a great story about the Shulgins at the end, too. Fucking poets indeed. Oh, and Perspects, great addition, too.
PS rigby your email was spot-on - i really appreciate it, thank you!
PPS creativemassacre, you ok? no post from you today & can't email you to check you're ok?
PPPS paradigm, just wanted to say 'hi' and hope you're doing ok
PPPPS statistick, really hope weavie is doing ok
PPPPPS antonio, i'm so fucking scared that i offended/annoyed you the other day! i'm so sorry if i did!!!!
PPPPPPS rupert everett's dry cleaner - ha ha ha ha!!!!
Oh, and also (this doesn't have anything to do with drugs, or...), I watched "Picnic at Hanging Rock" this weekend after Garrison (I think?) recommended it somewhere here sometime ago, and I just have to say, what a remarkable film. It's like a cold breath. A very mysterious and ethereal movie for sure, that everyone should see. What a beautiful and strange thing.
dennis, i saw yes twice, it's ok, baby, its ok. :)
i mean, i was diggin' yes AND the dolls, ya know? speaking of which, the dolls are coming to gay paree in october. i recommend you go.
sorry 'bout that broken lamp, me and antonio was wrasslin'!
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Hi Dennis & Co.
So Dennis, what are your feelings on Gallo? You should totally have a Gallo day! Though I fear Antonio and I would be the only sad pro-Gallo souls.
On another celluloid note, have you been reading about Lynch's INLAND EMPIRE? There are a handful of reviews out, all of which are incredibly mixed (mostly negative). One review states that it's the most inpenetrable movie ever made. I'm giddy with anticipation!
xoxo
d
C youth young death
allways feel like i gonna die next minute
lots of time passed on still here but how?
i don't know
To me the words are like you say some times fitting or not what is youth to youth cult?
what is old canival to old deepth master like in orient?
Not all the old people are cannivals of the youth
the ones like that some times are just kids trapped inside their old body
and just they do not want to accept their nature gainst nature transform them in canivals of what they need to still been who they where?
But and old reborn man is not a canival because he does not need youth from out side to feed him he is young inside forever
Niezcthe..Friedrich say some very nice thing about old and child..
child is curious and magic...
and old gardener it is that too...
look at the stars know about the winds hear the birds talk to the plants know about patiente and law of time for grownth..
gives and mantains life and accepts death too..
about the youth comodity the marketed youth..
Dennis understands the cannival and the pray..the young and the old and that is why he can be there so close..
A good old man is a child inside too..never let him down his child for ever..
vampires cannivals.
young are also cannivals of old
their suck their brains out..yes!
they suck their attention and love and then dump them
yeah
time time..
old lost child
still more lost..
so nice that you came here
i love your company and share icecream...
soon death
wow math tinder what a great day.
i guess i read too much hp lovecraft when i was a teenager, i tend to acquaint psychedelic drugs with mind-boggling terror and total loss of sanity, so i have never taken any.
but as dave graney, an australian rock icon, say, 'drugs are wasted on the young'. as i've gotten older and life has become a little less vivid, i've become more interested in drugs. i never took cocaine or speed in my teens and early 20s, it's only as life fell into routines and patterns that i've felt the need to enhance my senses.
dennis, if my beautiful boyfriend were to try to make contact with you while he was in paris, how would he go about it? should he just email you beforehand?
i understand child lost child you are right because sometime meat is what is not because meat doesn't mean what people think it means like my "generous" mouth means plump lips but not generous at all handsexual so maybe old flesh but time has not always almost never to do with truth so the age of the flesh means nothing like words that fit and don't fit and flesh that fits and doesn't fit
John says Hi back, Dennis and wishes all the best for you and Yury.
He's such a terrible sweetie.
vomiting ghost, Picnic at Hanging Rock is indeed a
beautiful ethereal film. The scenes in which the girls wander through the grampians just really hit home. Giving that hanging rock is only a couple of hours from where i live the towns are really thatg dry and beautiful. Also it's one film that highlights the spirit realm or the hidden indigenous histroy so fucken well. To me that's what the film is baout. Whitefellas failure to understand the spiritual realm of the land, since whitefellas primary focus is to exploit and rape and plunder the land.
i also agree with you re: acid and hallucingeons. part of me wants to take drugs like that but then i know that i shouldn't since i've had full on anxiety and out of body experiences w/o drugs then i don't think i actually need to take them. at the same time everyone i know who has taken psychedilic drugs are some of the most lucid, open down to earth people i've meet so i think i do want to try it one day. maybe though i should try mdma before. it will at least allow me to open up some of those blocked receptors in my head.
atheist, still felling all over the shop. will try and finish email today. spent last night gasbagging about the melbourne music scene so a little tired and out of it plus still feeling emotionally drained and on the point of a breakdow. i don't know whether it's healthy to force myself through ll this shit or not. but it needs to be done i think. so will see.
paradigm - this might be the best time to have a go.. it'll chill you out.. make sure you have a friend not on it to watch you.. stay home or go to a park.. think of it as brain medicine
as for OZ mdma.. the stuff i got was rubbish.. and i couldn't believe how much speed costs!
i'd love to try this 'true' lsd i must admit
MATH TINDER:
Quite the original, informative, and downright entertaining blog day you have provided. Much thanks to you, sir!
DENNIS:
Oh, wow. I just picked up the new Criterion Collection of Jaques Tati's PLAYTIME (which I had never seen) and well... big wow on that one. I highly reccommend it!
Also caught the new film SHERRYBABY (starring Maggie Gyllenhaal). I only went to this movie because I heard it was Maggie's best performance (and I LOVED her in SECRETARY). Well, she is phenomenal in what is really just a paint-by-numbers indie drama. She plays a recovering heroin addict trying to reconnect with her young daughter (which her brother has pretty much adopted while she was in prison). It may sound cliched (and much of the plot is) but Maggie is fearless in her complex performance, bringing much humanity and depth to a very frustrating individual.
Also wondering, Dennis, have you seen THE RULING CLASS starring Peter O' Toole. It's my favorite comedy... period.
Regards,
garrison
Vomitingghosts:
Oh, glad you enjoyed PICNIC AT HANGING ROCK. It's hands-down one of the best films I have ever seen. A very nice companion piece to TWIN PEAKS (if you're a Lynch fan). There's quite an interesting article comparing each film's female protagonist that appeared years ago in the Lynch 'zine WRAPPED IN PLASTIC. Maybe it's on the web somewhere?
cheers,
garrison
"I like drugs a lot." - Dennis Cooper
"I live for drugs." Thrill Kill Cult
Drug dealers have good drugs. Doctors have better drugs. The U.S. government has "the shit".
I'm straight-edge, it's pretty awesome. Getting on the vegan trip man, fucking health-nut, non-toxic, back to the earf and shit.
Sunny-side up, as they say!!!
lips of sherry
words and meanings
generous lips
yes ..
and suddently cruel
dry
with that moist plumb in your teeth
yes thank you C for understanding me
really..
i feel trap in words too..how to be certain?
words can take us to paradise
to hell
too
too many usseles worthless words
too many
and i feel dizzy
just like to have more ice cream
under a fresh tree...
i miss berlin now
and the park
and the spliffs..
so fresh and quiet.
Dennis..if you go to berlin you will not regret it i hope..
it is in a magic moment that city
its energy is so special and eclipses Paris in some sense..definetly eclipses london some how
saw a great movie from dario argento!
the bird with the cristal plumage!
But one of my favourites is Picknick In H Rock too..
must be amazing to live near there...
hey gang! i wanted to post here much earlier today, but shit got in the way, etc etc. i was actually hanging around my bedroom in the middle of the night, waiting for Dennis to post and hoping to score the first comment, but i suddenly had to go do a bunch of crap. something like 18 hours later, i'm finally back at my computer. sooooo...
i'm about to carefully read through everything and answer any questions/whatever that Research Chem day has raised, but first i'd like to offer;
from when i started writing the Day, i knew i wanted to post something, on my blog, on the same day Dennis used the piece. at first, i thought i'd write a 'trip report' or such for one of the chemicals mentioned, or explain that whole scene with the noose at the concert where i unknowingly ate 2ct7... But. while i know you grand souls here are the last people in the world to stereotype, i worried about portraying myself as The Drug User [or The Intelligent Drug User or The Obscure Drug User or whatever]. i am certainly good friends with a lot of molecules, but i've never wanted to overemphasize that aspect of my life. i mean, i will freely discuss my drug use just about anywhere and with just about anyone; i'm not shy about it in the least; but i'm always cautious about holding it up like 'this is me'.
so instead of a trip report, or anything overtly about drugs... i offer a different twin/mirror/shadow for 'fucking poets': A Post About A Girl. it's the top entry at my blog right now [pleasureiseasy.info]. basically i wanted to show another way, and another subject, that i hymn.
underneath, in the post immediately prior to the one about a girl, there's some notes about writing Research Chem Day. but... i will get to that as finally i check out all your comments and questions with the attention they deserve... starting just about now.
Thanx Again Stars
love, math+
yeah rigby. i heard that to about mdma. a close friend took some on the weekend and said that it was mainly speed with some herion and whatever happened to be on the floor. re: speed it depends where you get it. the bikers in melbourne have the best speed. sydneys better for coke. and yeah the more and more i think about it now is the time to take it otherwise i will go insane. just wish i didn't work so many early mornings.
paradigm - just take a couple of days off.. for recovery notes etc.
here's one for d_h.. i just watched Last Days.. is pitt related to brad.. which one is korine and is the end music the sound that was played at his funeral? this may not be your area at all.. just wondering
i really didn't like rock /grunge at the time i was too busy with noise so i expected to go meh! with this.. but i actually liked it a lot.. two of my friends killed themselves after looking at rivers.. strange what nature can do.. strange what nature is
to not be able to help a friend really sucks
hey rigby i think i'll ask some friends and take it in the next week or two. that sucks about your friends killing themselves staring into a river and yet it's totally understandable. i've always fantasised about taking a boat out to see or diving deep into a river and never coming back. it's the one scene in trainspotting that i totally indentify with- even though i've nver tried herion- where rennie dives into the toilet and just swims and swims and swims. totally disgusting considering the toilet it is in but at the same time that appeal of deep sea diving and the relaxation of water is great. to me the ocaen and the desert have the same tranquility about them. which is part of the charm of living in australia i guess. the proximity to the ocean and the distance to travel to the desert. it's also it's problem in that it creates an isolation mentality in the people who live here and delusions in the politicians (our aspirations to be american w/o actually engaging and recognising that we are closer to the whole of s/e asia and should endeavour to form more stable relationships with them). anyway i'm waxing and waning to much and should be working on some pages for a friends zine. actually i wrote a piece about you for that zine dennis. i'll send you across a copy when it's done next week. maybe a package with some other stuff from melbourne. okay back to photoshopping pictures of punks.
i'm surprised by the several here who have posted who've said that although they are interested in hallucinogenic drugs they have no interest in taking them......i guess what i want to say, very strongly, is that
there is no substitute for actual experience here.
yes, these drugs can be terrifying, awesome in their power, but therein abides some of the beauty of the trip.....in that sense of "i might not come back the exact same person as before."
EXACTLY
i'm not the same, and i would be extremely cautious about taking such chemicals again. yet i still look back and can recall portions of myself (or of the available universe) which i have never encountered any other way.
dysphoria is a real risk and should not be minimized, but one might also emphasize that the higher jouissance, the euphoria, is not there without the possibility of the dysphoria, the terror, throbbing just under the skin.
it's intense, in other words. but one might similarly say that pleasure is not accessible without perception of or apprehension of or danger of real pain.
viva le intensite!
yeah it sucks.. you feel you could have done something..but i know when i'm like that i'm just 'leave me alone' (JD) .. i thought the toilet scene was about the depths you'll sink to get a fx but i aybe wrong
tinder - i really get off on the chemical diagrams.. as i said scratch-and-lick.. i thought the dpt.jpg was sexy till i saw elpt.jpg (with a yeah knife!) poets vs writers indeed..
so i just posted a piece i wrote for a friends zine about dennis's work. check it out if you want. let me know what you think.
yeah. i think that's what the toilet scene is about as well, but i also think in sameway there's an expansion there about travelling through the depths of some murky water for that desired object. whether that be herion or something else.
rigby i too had a strong reaction to "last days".....more than i expected. but will have to get into that another time.
for the moment i'm thinking about math + and rimbaudian disordering of the senses, where this leads, pro et con rationales beyond vanity
and the caveats about impurity as noted above, as in: "what is this shit?"
crucial, to be sure.
I'm am one who used to think, "That is what's wrong with the world...people haven't done enough psychedelics." Now I think, "It's all the same. Nobody's missin' nothin', whatever." I think, "People are gonna do what they're gonna do...". I don't recommend drugs. Drugs can fuck people up bad, that's no fucking lie. "I can sit here and stare at these fucking nachos, or I can get on with this." All the time in the world to look at the pretty boys. Junk is my dream, love my tragedy. I've never heard of most of those chemicals jeesh.
because if one knows what speed is, or crystal, or for that matter vitamin k, ketamine, special k, then why take it if is disagreeable to one's organism?
also, sure, experimentation with one's psyche may be much less harmful when one is young. one is more supple then.
later on one stiffens as death nears. one cannot "bend" in the same way.
5stringaphasia: the girl's voice as she says "i live for drugs" in the thrill kill kult (which i at one point sampled out of love)
is as sexy as, or sexier, yeah sexier.....as kim barely muttering "oh shit" in sonic youth "eliminator jr"
you can feel it in your ass
maybe
I don't know about sexy, but they are one of the strangest bands I've heard. Never listened to Sonic Youth much. I was never so tasteful as now. Sexy to me right now is Dennis' boys, especially a bloody Brad type, of course, the Alex, Glenn Benton, my aging and ghostly doll, and uh tofu.
Tofu? Um, is that a dude?
LOL no, I'm going vegetarian.
yo! if i missed a question etc, let me know...
__jax: yeah, about using molecular diagrams, i had to make a pact with myself to avoid the usual kinds of visual drug fetishism as much as possible. to me, drug use is totally cute pills swapped in a handshake, powders in sexy vials, and cans of Fanta. but to make a piece of writing like this one look even vaguely like an ad is, sadly, to endanger what remains of the scene. thus, molecular diagrams; the most neutral possible illustrations. you can't really argue with them. that said though, i actually think they're totally pornographic. Laid Bare. Thin+Thick. yes, i have tripped on dextromethorphan [dxm], the active ingredient in most cough medicine. 'decongestants'= mostly stuff with psuedoephedrine, which is dangerous to take in large doses and, imo, not fun anyway.
__perspects: ha ha, well um thank you i suppose. McKenna's a perceptive dude and although he was never one of my favorite writers or anything, when he died, me+my friends did mushrooms that weekend in his honor. oh, twice a month is a lot for me too with anything hallucinogenic, or kinda hard on the body like mdma/mdmc/etc. good point about endogenous DMT- some people are familiar with that from the idea of 'licking toads' to trip, there being 5-MeO-DMT in some toad venom.
'DMT trails are solid'... i would put it: 'everything is 2d when you are on DMT'. for me, the _spatial_ plane completely vanishes. 'we all come from space': a-HA...
__have i seen 'the machines'? i have seen machine-type stuff on dmt... are they supposed to bother me or something? i definitely hear the whole 'elves' thing in talk around dmt more than machines, and i have totally never been visited by the elves despite having done a _lot_ of 5-meo-dmt. machines, yeah, i have seen like giant fleshy wheel things that seem to contain 'the world'/'the scene at hand'? they have an 'unwinding'-type motion that reminds me of salvia divinorum. is that a common vision? definitely dmt seems to render bare all kinds of machineries, natural/social/etc, but for me that's more-or-less what hallucinogens do.
__vomitingghosts: yeah, that's a great question. well, i had my first huge scary drug experience with some marijuana cake actually. college: i had never eaten the plant; a recipe was provided by a kid who'd clearly been getting shit weed back home; some of L.A.'s best pot was used. i personally ate a quarter-ounce of great pot [and we didn't even know we were could take the plant material out once the thc had soaked into the butter... so i ate the whole plant]. that was the first time i actually had a psychedelic experience, and i wasn't prepared for it in anyway; i thought we were going to get stoned and watch [so far as i recall] The Kids in the Hall. i ended up being unable to speak, dragging myself on the floor, passing out multiple times, puking on a freshly delivered pizza, and, i am told, speaking in a British accent. i thought i was dying the entire time. i had trouble breathing / kept forgetting to breathe [?]. i guess i was basically having an incredibly extended stoned panic attack. that's the worst drug experience i've ever had. as far as the whole 'confronting psychic demons' thing goes with respect to tripping... i don't know, in my experience, you confront that kind of thing when you need to, and hallucinogens can be a great aid/lubricant/tool. i've never been psychologically ambushed while tripping, though on plenty occasions i have made myself really take stock of who i am, what i'm doing, what's real, etc. a lot of the terror-speak around hallucinogenic drugs is... Romantic. remember: love has the same reputation, and they both deserve it.
__5stringsaphasia: the U.S. government has some pretty good shit. if you want 'the shit', talk to The Troops in any country.
__rigby: yeah thanx! i get off on the chemical diagrams too...
__ecstasy/heroin: it should be pointed out whenever the notion arises that finding heroin in pills sold as ecstasy, or in pills period, is incredibly rare. all opiates are more active when ingested any other way than orally. putting heroin into pills is not cost-effective. this is why you see people trying to do shit like IV an MS-Contin [morphine pill w/time release wax that will clog your veins forever]. a good source about the quality of global ecstasy tablets is http://pillreports.com . that said, if you're buying pills in the street you should really just get a simple test kit. Marquis reagant, for example, turns black in the presence of mdma/mda/mde and a sizable bottle seriously costs about as much as a Starbucks beverage.
__ignacio: shit, what could possibly lie beyond vanity?
__Research Chemicals, Obscure Drugs, etc: so as to avoid taking over Dennis' blog with what perspects aptly called 'drug geek' speak, i invite everyone to this post at my blog to talk about drugs/visions/etc. we can totally talk about it here, obviously, but i offer a space for overflow/tangents/whatever. also, archival copy of 'Fucking Poets' on my site, where if you want, you can see the names of the molecules that are anonymous here.
__Fucking Poets: what rhymes with '2ci'?
you got it.
luv, math+
math: "what could possibly lie beyond vanity?"
this gets us into a very large philosophical question.
hm. i'm reminded of when someone asked avital ronell why she was doing a book "about" stupidity she said "i've been doing field research all my life."
damn - those must be my airline tickets - I knew I dropped them somewhere; and I promise I'll return the book - I started it and just couldn't bare to stop
Hey Math, great post! I first heard about those books around the time Erowid first appeared (what a great site), and I've always meant to buy both of them but never have. I have about a zillion semesters of college chemistry under my belt, so I've always been interested in studying what the Shulgin's did from a chemical perspective, hear some of their theory. And yeah, provided I had the right lab equipment it would be fun to make some of this stuff, but you'd have to be completely insane to try to do this in the US right now, particularly procuring the precursors... though it would be interesting to check out what common chemicals they recommend using. And anyway, I think that largely, my experimental drug taking days are behind me.... but you never know.
__ignacio: yeah, i was basically being cute; i know that question is in the 'do we have free will?' genre [or at least that's where i place it]. i'm not familiar with avital ronell... cool quote, but i don't know how to relate it to vanity, Rimbaudian sense-derangment, etc. i have no idea if this touches the topic you're getting at, but for me drug use is a form of self-improvement, and my desire for self-improvement is borne of vanity. anyway... more by email, later on. christ, i've been awake for such a long time and i still have so much work to do...
__mikel: wow, a zillion semesters of college chemistry should certainly qualify you for many of PIHKaL's and TIHKaL's recipes. precursors... well, i think you'd be pretty s.o.l. if you tried to acquire, for instance, the ingredients for lsd, but many of the more obscure substances, i don't think it's that hard. i mean shit, people are constantly making mdma in America. anyway, you could glance over the part of PIHKaL and part of TIHKaL that are at Erowid. those excerpts have lots of information about the various processes of synthesis, but yeah, to get the Shulgins' clues on reagents/ingredients/etc, you gotta buy the books. of course, i have no idea if their tips are totally outdated now; i'm no chemist.
__+1 for... Picnic at Hanging Rock, Tripping edited by Charles Hayes, anticipation for Inland Empire, and yeah dear fucking god, the Berlin Alexanderplatz dvd release. by the way, i watched Katzelmacher last night and enjoyed it, but it wasn't a favorite.
love to all, math+
ps: um, you cannot make this shit up- my word verification is 'dykebf'.
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If the instructor had covered the chemistry that you did, I might not have failed my first time in Organic Chemistry.
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