Xmas post # 4

Let's say there is a Santa Claus. Let's say he leaves a gift under a Xmas tree with your name on its tag. This is it (see: above). Its dimensions are four foot square. What would you most want to find inside it? Remember, we're talking about Santa Claus, not God or Harry Potter or a genie in a bottle. In other words, abstract things like world peace or sex with (fill-in-the-blank) -- although if you think (fill-in-the-blank) could fit into the box, you could at least make your move and see what happens -- or (fill-in-the-blank) resurrected from the dead would not be in there. That said, what is your wish? (If you want to know mine, it's rather unsurprisingly a US green card for Yury.) Okay, have at it.
p.s. So Yury and I have just hit another wall in our US visa quest. Actually, we just hit about three walls at the same time. We're crushed and freaked yet again. I was going to lay it all out for you today and use the blog to send a heartfelt, desperate plea for help into the world. But it's fucking Xmas. You're all stressed out buying last minute gifts and dealing with family dramas or having really nice times with loved ones and all of stuff, so I'm going to hold off and make my plea after Xmas. 'Cos I really do wish you out there, whoever you are, the holiday of your dreams. Me, I'll regain my strength and composure and see you tomorrow.
p.p.s. josh feola, I haven't gotten your email yet, but it's the holidays so the website folk who forward me the mail might be busy. I'll keep my eyes open. Child Molesters, yeah, of course. I saw them a bunch and knew a couple of the members a little. It's cool you're into that period LA. It was a great time that produced some really interesting stuff that, in some cases, is not nearly well enough known. **** saa viccenzo, I know and like Sufjan Stevens, of course, and Amos Lee rings a bell, but I'm not sure I've heard him/her. I'll investigate, thanks. **** jack, Well, one of the top dogs at Matador Records told me that Pollard had told him the song 'Subspace Biographies' (on 'Waved Out') was inspired by his reading 'Guide.' It's never been confirmed, but, based on the lyrics, it's always seemed like it was true. I hope so 'cos it's a great song. I'll ask Pollard when I finally meet him one of these days. **** jesse, Hey. Many have talked about wanting to make a film of 'Closer.' Gregg Araki was interested years ago, and others, but it's never gone anywhere. If Kenneth Anger had actually made a 'Closer' movie, obviously it would have been way beyond a dream come true. Even the fact that he wanted to -- and actually still wants to -- is a mindboggling honor. It's very cool you wanted to make it into a movie. Hey, never say never.

20 Comments:
as many books from The Photographers Gallery bookshop here in london that would fit in a box of that size that i don't have already. is that greedy? i don't care i want them!
have a great weekend Dennis.
Considering I spend the most money on buying CDs and DVDs, I guess I'll go with a gift card to Virgin Megastore for an insane amount of money for a gift card, like $5,000. That would be nice. The sad part is that I probably wouldn't even allow that gift card to last for a long time; knowing my shopping habits, I'd probably go bananas and spend it all in a week or two.
Maybe I should request a pair of airline tickets to somewhere I've never been before, like somewhere in Europe, instead, along with a stack of dough to take care of hotels, travel, food, entetainment, and shopping. At least that would be something new and exciting--a new life experience.
I'd ask for a puppy, but we're not allowed to have pets in my building. Plus, I can't see me training a puppy or even walking one however many times a day at this point in my life. I'll wait for my dream house with the fenced in backyard so I can just let the dog out in the yard to piss and shit. Then I'll pay someone to clean up the yard once a week. Ha! Ha! That would be hysterical.
OK, I'll just go for the gift card to Virgin.
Enjoy the holidays Dennis, and sorry to hear of the latest misfortunes in regard to the visa situation. I wish there really was a Santa who could provide you with that green card. If that were possible, Santa would be even more popular around the world.
robert
if you unscrewed the legs of an eames la chaise (white, molded plastic chair - modeled after gaston lachaise's 'floating figure'), that might fit. Im boring though. modern to post modern period design pleases me more than just about anything.
Im not fond of this holiday.
I'd like the box filled with thousand dollar bills and I'd donate that money to organizations that do good work and are in need of it. Off the top of my head Sea Shepherd and Oxfam. 50/50 split
Or of I was being selfish 4 pills- 1 for each of my dogs. The pills would make the dogs live as long as me, so I'd never have to see them die. also- a nintendo revolution and a copy of twighlight prncess.
This is very personal... anyway, I don't like very much to receive presents so I'll be true in saying that I'd love to find in the box the perfect present for my father, one he would not be disappointed by, as he probably will be by any crappy present I am able to find just about the day before christmas.
I haven't see him in a year, he never call me, I never call him, he doesn't even know where I live or with whom... he's a neurotic as probably I am... but we have this family tradition must of the Xmas and there's so much pressure about it everything goes obviously wrong in the end. Last time he... went in the other room to soundly cry for some shit about my/our life I removed from my mind.... scenes from the Simpson family in reverse.
That is to say, to have the perfect gift for him in my hands would make me feel a little more comfortable... or less scared by his grave face. Yeah and one good present for his wife too.
(And a bunch of visas for all the great people stuck into bureocracy in the world I heard of. They won't occupy that much space in the box anyway, it's just crappy papers in the end).
great Santa to everyone of you, people.
love,
Hi Coop Merry X Mas!
My friend and collaborator Dialect - A 19 year old electonrica artist from London has made 3 electronica renditions of traditional Christmas songs theres 3 of them free to download on his website anyone who likes aphex,telefon tel aviv,explosions in the sky check them out.
www.buildingswithtownsin.com/
He sent me a CDR of Jingle Box last christmas as a audio X Mas card, at the end of the track it had a robot/stephen hawking voice saying 'merry christmas steven' i started crying it was so sweet.
I printed of photos of that creepy santa and made Christmas cards for friends + family they look so cool.
as for what i want for X Mas.... hmmm preview advance screening tickets for:
A Scanner Darkly
The New World
Glitterati
V For Vendetta
Hostel
PS
merry christmas blogger James!
call me i lost your number
Mmmm... interesting question. In the box, I'd like to find a pair of plane tickets for me and my boyfriend to spend 2 weeks in Iceland (a place he adores and I would love to see for myself).
take care all...
- garrison
PS - I sincerely hope you get your Christmas wish, Dennis.
A box of pills sounds fun.
i would love a 6 dvd set of cocteau twins, bluebell knoll era bootlegs...totally attainable i trust
Gawd..I can't think of anything, so I donate my box to someone with imagination!
It's shite about the visa, pal:( I hate that this is happening...
I'm away now til the 26th, so cool supportive thoughts to you, and the compliments of the season to everyone else.
Take care
Hey,
Lost net access for a week, still i didn't feel too much like a geeky amputee so i still have a kernel of dignity...
Anyway, in my box I'd like my now ex-boyfriend to burst out as though from an MGM cake and state that he was only kidding about the split and that we'd get to spend christams together.
Failing that, and on a less sombre and self-indulgent note, I'd like the box to contain genes of every type of flora and fauna on the planet, and for the box to be delivered to another planet whereupon the Gene Ark could be tipped out and gene cocktails would flow freely, hybrid rivers forming channels of trippy animals across Mars.
Or...On a less mescaline-induced note, I'd like a four-foot across model of Gwyneth Paltrow's head so I could re-enact the end of Se7en in a Zoo TV style.
Whereas, actually, if I could have anything in that four-foot box I'd like a recording contract with a modest indie label just to provide some back-up while I self-produce my music. A four-foot contract written in big crayon writing with no ugly bindings, rather like the Factory contract I guess, except slightly more stable... just some security so I could be less angsty about my job.
Wishing you and yours well this christmas Dennis, despite/given the circumstances...Shitty news (again) about the visa, next year'll bring some positive resolution, I'm sure.
And everyone, have wonderful christmases and enjoy love, life and peace (if you want it:-)) next year...and beyond...
Take care,
Nick.
dennis,
tiki boy,a torch and a bottle of wine
or
a 4x4 cube of xanax
or
ren and stimpy,in reality!,running around the house on christmass morning
the visa problem sucks, i hope something works out,
take care,
alex,x.
wow ... that's really cool about 'Subspace Biographies', that song is a real favourite and has stayed in the live set pretty much til the end I think. Ironically it was one of the highlights of a GBV show we saw at the Paradiso in Amsterdam a couple of years ago(I, uh, like Amsterdam a lot btw, but i've only ever been there for short and very stoned periods of time). Did you ever hear them play it live? Pollard actually sings that weird keyboard chorus at the beginning and end, great stuff.
I wish you could get a green card for Yuri too!
all i want for x-mas is to chill out for a week and not get another cold again.
love and peace,
thomas
I really appreciate how you rustle to us.
I love you all. "never say never"...
Please, to all: Hold On.
Take care of the blue man...
-White Oleander-
i would leave the box unopened. i think imagining what is in it would be better than discovering what actually is.
http://www.poetryproject.com/poets&poems/prevpoet.html
4' x 4'?
Anything material?
I'd ask for a brand new Sony CineAlta HD camera with fantastic lenses. ($150K)
I'd also take a Panasonic Varricam, complete wih lenses ($65K for body, ? for lenses).
I'd even take one of Panasonic's new "prosumer" HD cameras that just came out that run about $7K and record in 1080, 24p.
But yeah, the Sony.
I'm a cine-tech wonk.
Hope you have a good holiday--
D
Hey Dennis, i wish you a merry Xmas from Paris, France.
a bottle of Xanax, a bottle of Stoli and a gram of blow.
I want an 80's, Bret Easton Ellis xmas.
box:
1. 1 oz. really good weed
2. kitten (in smaller sub-box w/air holes, etc.)
3. long handwritten letters to me from several people
4. Stratocaster formerly owned & played by any of several people
5. air tickets to Paris for me & cat
6. US green card for Yury
all packed in snugly with wadded-up
7. hundred dollar bills
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